Give Up, Give In?

The hardest part of trying to get healthy is not the exercise, but the food. I am powerless to sweets, an admitted Chocoholic, a beater and spatula licker, and an emotional eater.

Most recently, I have had several episodes where I get this ache that starts out as hunger, but turns into something that I cannot seem to satisfy. When that happens, I feel completely out of control, which makes my eating out of control. Sitting with the "empty" feeling is also difficult for me, so instead I mostly just try to get rid of it by eating--however only massive amounts of food tends to work, if you can call that "working". It's really not working for me, but I'm not sure what to do.

The worst thing about it is that it makes you feel very alone. Like, what's wrong w/ me? Why can't I just eat normal like everyone else? But truthfully I know I'm not alone and a lot of people have trouble w/ emotional eating. I haven't been able to figure out where this insatiable appetite comes from, or what to do about it. I think the key is distraction or finding out what it is that's actually bothering me. I think there will be lots of trial and error involved!

My biggest concern is I don't want my negative feelings about how I've been eating lately to effect my motivation to work out. Many times it feels pointless, but I guess I have to remember that this is a process, and I'm going to continue to fail until I figure out what works for me.

�Like success, failure is many things to many people. With Positive Mental Attitude, failure is a learning experience, a rung on the ladder, a plateau at which to get your thoughts in order and prepare to try again.� -W. Clement Stone

So, on that note I am sticking w/ my planned workout tonight at the gym even though I feel like complete crap about myself. I'm going to try to work on turning those negative thoughts around because I have a great weekend ahead of me! I'm working a wedding this Saturday and then heading with the girls to Indy for a night out on the town!

Last night I did Workout 2 of the 30 Day Shred. It started out fine, but towards the end it got much harder! I do have to say, what I like about Jillian's workouts are that they incorporate everything from cardio to strength to abs. It's an all around workout that targets every zone. Also, to her critics, I find her tough love attitude refreshing. I don't need a cheerleader, I need someone to kick my ass in the gym! Sure, at the time I might hate you for it, but I am more likely to want to punch the bubbly cheerleader in the face rather than the Army Sergent. But that's just part of what works for me.

This weekend will be busy, so everyone take care and have an awesome three day weekend! I'll have some more pictures of cakes to post soon!
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